I work full time in media production. I’m part of a team of very talented graphic and video designers, writers, editors, webmasters, sound engineers, etc. So you might say that I’m a bit biased towards media. It’s amazing for getting your message out to large groups of people, giving your projects authority, introducing yourself, and even providing regular automated updates.
But media isn’t so good at connecting you with people. Media may be cool, but it’s impersonal. If you want to connect with people you have to actually talk with them. There’s lots of ways to do this:
Send them an email
Surprise, surprise – the lowly email is still used by just about everyone. This is the primary way I connect with people. I’ve gone back and forth between quick notes to individuals and longer newsletters. I’ve found a middle ground by using MailChimp to send out my emails – I can actually address my friends by name instead of sending out a generic “Hi Everybody” email. The caveat is make sure to answer everyone’s replies so that there’s an actual conversation not just a bad imitation of a megaphone. Still, I think the connection value here isn’t that great.
Level of connection: low
Send them a printed newsletter
This is a bit better than sending an email newsletter. I mean, you spent the time to print it out, write a handwritten note, sign it, put it in an envelope, etc. etc. I’m not being scientific here by any means, but I have the feeling that most of these don’t get read. I could be wrong. Oh, and you’re using trees to print it and hours of your life to manage the whole process for marginally better connection. If I were you, I wouldn’t do it – but that’s just me.
Level of connection: very low
Send them a handwritten letter
Who does this? Exactly! No one sits down and writes real letters any more, which makes this far more powerful than a mere email or newsletter. In fact, I think this is only second to an actual sit-down conversation – maybe even tied. If you aren’t regularly writing letters, try it. You’re communicating how much you value someone when you take the time to write a personal letter. This takes time though, so you’re probably not going to be able to do this for all 800 people in your address book.
Level of connection: off the charts
Give them a phone call
The best an email, newsletter or handwritten letter can do is provide one side of the conversation. A phone call gives you both sides. Rather than pushing out what you want to say, you get to ask questions and hear answers without making the other person work very hard. The drawback: you miss all the non-verbal cues that you would get if you saw them in person.
Level of connection: medium
Set up a Skype date
All the power of an actual conversation – plus you get to see each other! The only problem is that there’s a half-second delay that makes your conversation just slightly awkward. And you’re stuck in a box. Still, if you’re overseas or on the other side of the country, this is as good as it gets. And it’s pretty good.
Level of connection: medium-high
Get Coffee
Sharing coffee or a meal is the single best way to connect with someone. I mean, you’re in person – how much closer can you get? If you are an overseas missionary visiting your home country, this is vital to maintaining your friendships. If you’re in full-time ministry at a local fellowship this will keep you from being trapped in a bubble.
Level of connection: high
What about the rest?
There are other ways to connect that I haven’t mentioned in this post – instant messaging, Facebook, Twitter, text messaging – but this will help you prioritize the ways that you connect with people. Go for the high level connections first and then fall back to lower levels as you need to. Even low level connections are better than no-level connections.